Early Childhood Education Videos Scare me…

No more…No more…

*Note, this post might or might not be in the upcoming novel An American in China. This is just a post describing why young educational videos and cartoons for children scare me. Enjoy my suffering.*

As a teacher in a foreign school, I frequently use educational videos to educate children on different subjects ranging from the different rooms of the house to actions. But for every good educational video that teaches children about the English language, there is a plethora of videos that are either horribly made, don’t teach what they are supposed to and/or just plain scary. Now, sometimes this is understandable considering that the budgets and creative teams behind some of the videos can be lacking. But for television shows that are meant for younger children, it is saddening such as the very popular yet incredibly idiotic Peppa Pig; a show that is what I believe is detrimental for children’s education (I will go into this later). Let’s first notable examples of children’s education videos that are more frightening that educational.

Oh gods on high, where do I begin with this video?

This is called ‘The House Song’ made and released by Busy Beavers – Kids Learn ABCs 123s & More and it is horrid. Let’s talk about the obvious: the animation. The animation in this video alone is poor and shoddy at best. It looks like the work that a flash animation student would do on his first day at community college. I have animated better material than this before and I suck at animation. Secondly, the singing; If you notice, there are two singing voices heard in the song, one male and one female. The problem is, there is only one person seen singing the song. So, it is one person providing the dual male and female singing voices in the video which comes off as creepy. Lastly, the man singing the song is watching a baby elephant taking a bath (pedophilia) and watching a clearly high lion watching seizure television. That is not only ten shades of illegal activity, but it is CREEPY AS HELL! I mean, did no one think about the video design or layout? Was there no planning or thought put into the video? Ok, let’s move on to the next piece of horrific children’s videos.

Oh no…

Now, let me begin by saying that green screens have provided some of the greatest computer generated images in film out there, but the thing is that you have to have either the technical know-how or the finances to make it appear interesting. This on the other hand, is just sad. Combine this with a man, who not only lacks a singing voice, but looks like he should stay as far away from children as possible, makes for an unsettling video.This video was made by Dream English Kids, which uses the same guy with the same nasally singing voice and  green screen effects to teach everything from counting to actions and everyone of them is just as creepy.


I don’t know what it is about this video, but this literally scares me. When my coworker Anna showed me this video, I had an expression of fear on my face as I asked her to turn it off. She laughed it off, but it scares me.

Earlier I mentioned how I have a disdain for the popular children’s cartoon Peppa Pig. The show, written by not one but THREE people (Neville Astley, Mark Baker and Phillip Hall). With lines like “Peppa Pig likes jumping in muddy puddles” and episodes that last only five minutes a piece, I can only assume that they think that this is comparative to Shakespeare. The premise is that Peppa pig and her family experience different things from befriending potentially dangerous spiders to grandfathers endangering their grandchildren’s lives in a dick measuring contest under the guise of a boat race. The show is poorly written, the animation is atrocious and the characters are awful. Every episode of the show ends exactly the same, with the characters laughing on the ground no matter what they were doing, whether if it is grocery shopping or performing home repairs. The show does not offer anything education for children that couldn’t be taught by an attentive parent. The animation is clearly made in flash with limited effort, making me wish for a return of hand drawn animated cartoons. As for the characters, Peppa Pig the titular character is a bad influence for children. In several episodes, she insults her father (calling him fat) and her brother (calling him stupid and speaking down to him); She is vain, compulsive, she lies to others, she is a bad influence.

If by some sort of freak accident (considering my dating luck) that I have children of my own, I am showing them cartoons that I was raised on: Batman and Animaniacs.

On a side note, Road Trip of the Damned is currently being edited right now by a friend of mine Dominique, who helped me with Dead Boys. If you need any document edited, please visit her Fiverr page and check out her services.


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